A famous Nigerian preacher-Sam Adeleye-says If you try to
make yourself El Shaddai, the only thing that will happen is you shall die. El
Shaddai is God’s attribute of All-sufficiency. Anyone else who takes it on
himself will suffer the consequences.
Entrepreneurs often find themselves in a space where they
need to say yes to many different requests. You see, we are problem solvers. It
feels like we are always on the lookout for problems to solve as long as
someone is paying us to do it. While this is a good thing, it is possible to
cross a dangerous line. If you are not careful, you may say one yes too many.
For your overall health and well-being, get used to saying no unless you have
no other option.
Every no you fail to say may mean you spend money you didn’t
have to, hire employees you don’t need, sanction a product that adds zero value
just to mention a few issues. If you want to remain on the cutting edge of what
you do, you must get comfortable saying no.
Warren Buffet one of the most successful investors of all
time has some good advice for us when it comes to saying no. He says, The difference between successful
people and really successful people is that really successful people say 'no'
to almost everything. This is because they realize every yes you don’t think
through will tie up your money, time and energy unnecessarily. It is better to
take time and think through alignment before you say yes to any proposal
brought your way. Every unnecessary yes you say will come back to bite later.
When you say no to the good, you create room to focus on the
best. Sometimes the enemy of great is good enough. Before you say yes, ask how
it affects your core deliverables. Every job has deliverables. What are your
KPI’s as an individual or a business? Unless you define those, it will be
difficult to decide what adds value and what doesn’t. Once your KPIs are in
place, weigh every proposed activity through the lens of the value it adds to
your achievement whether directly or indirectly. You should have no time for
misaligned opportunities. Not every open door is one you should walk through.
No is a vote for your time. Time is the most finite of all
resources. Everyone can make more money, no one can make more time. You need to
spend your time working on the stuff that matters most and exclude everything
else. Saying no to what hurts you means saying yes to what will enhance your
life.
Keep your interests few and deeply meaningful. In a world of
competing interests and priorities, take time to vote for what matters most,
what aligns with your purpose and let everything else slide. Derek Sivers says
‘If it’s not a hell yes it is a no’ meaning if you don’t buy into it wholly
from the onset then maybe it is not worth pursuing. While this is not entirely
accurate, it is a good rule of thumb for deciding where to devote your
attention. There is value in doing a few things really well than becoming a
jack of all trades. It wears you out and produces nothing spectacular when you
are all over the place.
Say no to pointless meetings. One of the things that can
steal a lot of your time is unnecessary meetings. A good way to look at it is
‘if it can be texted, don’t call, if you can call about it, don’t email, if it
can be emailed don’t call a meeting for it. Spend as little time on meetings as
possible and set a specific time for every meeting you must have. Steve Jobs
used to do walking meetings with people so that he keeps them short and useful.
Maybe you should adopt something similar.
Why does it matter?
Besides your business, you have other priorities like faith,
family and whatever else lights up your world. Saying no to wrong/misaligned
requests frees up time for the things you treasure most. Your wellness depends
on the number of no’s you say daily.
How to say No.
Be clear and direct-No is a full sentence. Stop with the
explanations.
Offer alternatives if appropriate-Can someone stand in for
you, let them go.
Delay your response-You don’t have to respond to everything
right when it is asked.
Prioritize your values and limits. Be clear on why you can’t
take this on.
Be respectful but firm-I appreciate you thinking of me but I
will have to pass this time.
Avoid over explaining, vagueness and rudeness in your
responses.
What do you think of the need to say no? How does it aid your own wellness? Have you ever found yourself in a space where it was hard to say no? How did you handle it without losing the person? Your experiences might just help someone therefore feel free to share them in the comments.

